Language of love

Language is described as the principal method of human communication consisting of words used in a structured and conventional way, conveyed by speech or writing; however, language is not merely restricted to the two—certain gestures contribute to the art too. The old phrase “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” seems to be a fallacy, for words truly possess the power to injure one’s feelings and self-esteem. Words have the capability to wreck a person, though they are also fully capable of granting one with a sense of comfort, ease and love. 

Which brings us to the motivation behind this article: Love Languages.

Love language is essentially a concept that describes the way one receives or expresses love. 

Since it is a concept, love language is not inherently restricted or confined to a specific set of actions. It differs for every person and is personal to each, pages may run out but the multitudinous soul-stirring ways in which people tend to express their love will never end. So, drawing inspiration from Gary Chapman in his book, ‘The Five Love Languages,’ we’ll narrow the concept down to five aspects which can be applied to several types of relationships:

  •  Acts of service:

An act of service itself is performing a task for another person. Stemming from appreciation and observing the little things the other likes, this aspect usually entails knowing the other person or their preferences. One might just be overly familiar with the phrase “actions speak louder than words” and it seems to depict the truth for little, apparently insignificant acts such as bringing flowers for one, running errands, helping with chores that make one feel loved, seen, and appreciated. 

  • Gifts:

Quite the misunderstood love language, giving gifts is deemed materialistic though the phenomenon of exchanging gifts is more than just wanting to buy and receive expensive items. Gift-giving has always been a symbol of adoration: picking up a personalized gift for one would portray the time and effort that went behind it, for a thoughtful gift is always more treasured than an expensive one (and you can quote us on this). 

  • Words of Affirmation: 

Words of affirmation are essentially the depiction of love through spoken words, praise or appreciation. This entails uplifting quotes, love notes, or even something as effortless as a ‘good morning’ text. These small gestures can come as heartwarming remedies for a cloudy day, especially to those that recognise their significance. 

  • Quality time:

Sometimes the way to one’s heart is to simply be present—oftentimes, undivided attention can come as a gush of fresh wind during an extremely hectic day. This would mean getting rid of a plethora of distractions and engaging with the person themselves. Spending time with one’s favorite person or even the act of enjoying another’s presence contributes to quality time. 

  •   Physical touch: 

Minor things such as hugs or holding hands contribute to this category: physical affection paves the way for an exchange of a sense of security and warmth from the people involved. Because really, is there anything a long, tight hug from someone you love can’t fix? 

There are innumerable benefits of acting on or understanding another’s love language. It promotes selflessness and a sense of empathy, for one is focused on another’s needs and is fundamentally learning to—as cheesy as this may sound—speak another’s language. This conversation of sentiment instead of speech fosters deeper, healthier bonds between people and gives us (read: hopeless) romantics a chance to glamorize even the simplest of actions. 

We hope this article helped you figure out what your love language is and better understand the love languages surrounding you. Trust us when we say a simple exchange of annotated novels or reminding the people around you that you’re proud of them will only make your relationships healthier and happier!

TLC Writer
Anousheh Usman

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