1. Lots of boom.

 

2. If you’re a pyromaniac, we will help you cater to your skills. Don Draper style.

 

3. Having trouble growing long fab curly hair? Fret no more, joining us will give you an automatic boost.

Absolutely fabulous. It’s science. Trust us.

 

4. Do you have unspent anger? Want a place to release that energy? Look no further.

Disclaimer: we can’t promise you’ll look this cute doing it.

 

5. Its necromancy — without the need to sell your soul to Satan.

6. Want to prank your arch Enemy and ruin their game? Stink bombs are a norm.

 

7. We might offer cooking classes!

Ice cream flambé.

 

8. Most importantly: if you’re someone who reads the ingredients off the back of shampoo bottles — you get a scholarship.

Happy choosing!

by Shaheer Niazi
Math and Science Society President